When I was young, I’m not a kid anymore. But some days, I sit and wish I was a kid again.
I did my homework in Trapper Keepers and hid my grades in Pee Chee folders.
My school banned Pogs as gambling.
Only one kid was ever lucky enough to own Crossfire.
We were accused of being drug dealers for having pagers. 823-143-80085
Fads were annoying enough to be officially outlawed.
Fashion kept changing quickly, but it was usually over-sized and obnoxiously colorful.
Teachers made us read our text messages in front of the entire class.
Girls never jocked, flirted, macked, or liked me. Little has changed.
We hid earbuds in our sleeves in order to listen to music in class.
There was no auto-tune. Beautiful people lip-synced over a lesser attractive person’s singing.
Koreans rocked the roots of reggae.
Hip-hop was on welfare.
Two graduation songs brought us to tears.
We learned family values from an obstetrician in whacky sweaters.
And these guys were Gangnam Style.